Long Sentences Be Damned!

An intriguing article recently appeared in the Los Angeles Times. The author and journalist, Pico Iyer, wrote about why we need long sentences. His premise certainly flies in the face of everything I've told folks in my business writing workshops or speeches! He posits that we are all caught up in sound-bite writing. Just fill the page with facts and speedily please!

Though he can wax philosophically about how we are losing the nuance and beauty of lengthy sentences, I have to disagree with him when it comes to business writing.

If we can't get upper management to read our emails, how will we get them to read our spec report or technical memo or audit report if we are trilling along with 700 word count (count them!) sentences? Remember these rules:

1. Keep your sentences under 20 words. Technical topics: the sentences may go to 24 words.
2. Keep your sentences in email under 15 words. Some are advocating eight words per sentence, especially if you're an international company.
3. Writing short sentences does not mean you give up depth and specificity.

Bring Your Document In for a Smooth Landing

A Power 1 sentence or paragraph at the end of your document is just as important as the one that begins it. Your ending can determine what remains in your client's mind long after he or she has finished reading.

Use your conclusion to build rapport or to state what should happen next. A memorable quote, a discussion of benefits, and a summation of points are all techniques you can use in your conclusion. Just remember: If you restate or emphasize your main points, be certain to add a different twist to your words so your conclusion doesn't sound stilted.

Then try this writer's trick: After adding the conclusion, reread your introduction. Does it still work? The two should work well together to give your documents a smooth finish.
 

Bad Writing = BAD Business

All of you know my thoughts regarding bad writing being BAD business. This video "Bad Writing is Killing America," on Ragan.com, speaks directly to what I have been telling my clients for years! Please listen and obey! OR call us to help you achieve good writing.

Think Twice Before Sending!

Junk mail, including ads, jokes, trivia, and pictures of your kids, can be overwhelming. Most users complain they already have too many messages to sift through every day. Be sure the recipient is interested in the content of your email before you hit SEND.

Power Zero Sentences Catch A Reader's Attention

Unless you are creating a technical report, most documents you write will contain Power Zero sentences. Sales letters, marketing brochures, Web sites, executive summaries, annual reports-all these need beginnings that hook your audience immediately.
 

Power Zero sentences can:

• open a document with a bang, create interest, and hint at what's coming
• be used to greet or thank your reader
• provide necessary background before you launch into your main points

Experiment with different kinds of Power Zero sentences. For example, you could start your document with an intriguing question, a startling statistic, an illustration, a quote or anecdote. Take a look at the Wall Street Journal's editorial page to see Power Zero sentences at work. Usually you'll find a paragraph or two of background information on the topic or a quick personal story that grabs your attention. Once you're hooked, they outline their opinion.

Articles Banned by Marketers

The Wall Street Journal has a great article on its front page about the elimination of articles, such as "an," "the," and "a" in marketing pieces. The new trend seems to be to drop them!

For example, Nook, not THE Nook, iPhone, not AN iPhone. It's all about branding, according to Creative Director, Glenn Kaplan of Barnes and Noble, Inc., "When a brand evokes something bigger than just a little object, it doesn't want to have 'the' in front of it."

WOW! Is all I can say. Please know that for us humble folks who are trying to get our clients, customers, and colleagues to read our writing--this is not a good rule to follow. The authors, Fowler and Kane, share this example: "Main feature of combined first floors of new building..." Doesn't make sense without the articles, does it?

I Can't Emphasize This Enough

Have you ever noticed that advertisers love to use-or misuse-quotation marks? You've probably seen signs like these:

• "Free" Checks
• "Friendly" Sales People 
• "Fast" Delivery

Why are these words in quotes? Maybe the advertisers thought you'd pay more attention to their products or services, but sometimes quotation marks can imply a sarcastic tone. To add emphasis, these writers could have used italics or a different font color or underlined key words.

Moral of the story? Even if you're really hungry, avoid places that advertise "fresh" sushi. Well, that and use punctuation marks correctly or you could send some strange messages. For a good punctuation review, read Chapter Five of Business Writing That Counts.